When I got out of the Psych Ward I went to school the next day. I wrote this guy I liked named Richie. I wrote that I liked him. The next day was a Friday and we met up after school. We started walking to his house. We saw his friends Cody and Dustin. They asked if we wanted to smoke some weed. I admitted that I had never done it before. They said they would show me how to smoke it. They couldn't believe I had never smoked before and asked where I had been. I smoked for the first time and it felt pretty good.
When we got to Richie's house he asked me what movie he should put in. I actually really didn't care. He put in some Vampire movie. We sat on the couch and he kissed me. This was my first french kiss with a guy! I was used to things going slow, but he didn't waste 5 minutes! He pinned me on the couch. He tried to unbutton my pants. I moved his hand away. He kept trying. Now his hand was down my pants and I could hardly breath from the endless kissing.
The last time I did this it was with Whitney. I was trying to decide who was a better kisser and if I liked it from girls or guys. I was confused. I didn't know what I was supposed to think or feel. Was this really how it was supposed to be? I wanted my first make out session with a guy to be special. I know I told him that I had a crush on him, but I didn't think he would move this fast! He even had asked me on the phone if I was a virgin. I told him I was, and I know he lied and said he was too.
I finally got up the nerve to tell him to stop having his hand down my pants. He seemed kinda annoyed, but he took his hand away. I wasn't ready to get fingered. We ended up making out on the floor. I remember his saying, "God, your beautiful!" I was getting so tired, but he wasn't done yet! He pulled down his pants. He then put my hand on his dick and I gave him a hand job.
A little while later, he walked me half way home. He kissed me Good Bye. I watched him skate board away. It was after midnight when I got home. My parents were asleep.
The next night Richie called me asking me to go to a party with him. I made up an excuse that I had to watch my little brother. I think I was just scared about what he expected of me. I wasn't ready to have sex with him. He sounded disappointed on the phone.
When I saw Richie at school it was weird. We really had nothing to say to each other. I guess we never really talked much before either. I honestly think he wanted to see how far he could go with me sexually. I didn't get too upset about it. I mean, how could I? I had set myself up by telling him I had a crush on him.
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